I’m writing to you with a heavy heart because just a few minutes ago, I was told off yet again by my dad. In addition to the other issues I’m currently facing, it feels like I’m being dragged deeper into the forest.
This whole week (first week of school) had been a whirlwind, with everyone teachers and students alike, trying to regain momentum and prepare for the End-of-Year exams. After a long and tiring week, I sought a day out on Saturday after Science Day in school. And because he saw that I had time for my friends and not for my sick aunt, he brought up his list of “things-I-have-failed-at”.
When he was done, I was left hurt and feeling like I have been wrongly accused (because I had made plans to visit her this coming week but had not shared those plans with him) and then it made me angry that he was always jumping to conclusions and assuming things, instead of clarifying.
Amidst an array of negative thoughts and feelings, I decided to seek solace in reading and meditating on God’s word. As I was reading the reflections for today’s gospel, the phrase “familiarity breeds contempt” stuck out to me. It got me thinking if God was trying to speak to me and then if there was actually some truth in what my dad was saying.
I know that there are times when I would get carried away with having my own fun and take the people closest to me for granted. I started to feel a sense of guilt wash over me as this time, I realized that the person I have been neglecting is you, my Lord and my God, who silently, patiently and ceaselessly walks by me.
I was then prompted to surrender my guilt and my sin of pride, at the foot of the cross.
As I finish this letter, I see the image of Jesus’ comforting embrace in my mind and am filled with a sense of peace and renewed hope.
Thank you and I love you, please continue to walk with me and call me back to you.