Oceans are not that deep after all.

Vocation is like driving a car, many of us always tell God “please steer us in the right direction!” then complain that we do not see God’s hand at work or God does not seem to be listening to our prayers. But that is because we are not driving the car and making it move. Steering is not apparent until the car is actually moving. He said that a better way of doing it would be to actually get the car moving first and tell God: “God I’m going to go down this path! Please show me if I am going the wrong way.” We need to have the car moving first (i.e. make our own decision first and actually take action) before we will be able to notice Gods prompting. Often people just wait and wait for some sort of divine revelation.

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Intriguing? Is it not?

I received this inspirational text from my friend just recently and it spoke acutely to me.

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As I browsed through my journal and blog posts, they were highly evocative entries of the plateau I was trapped in.

A man-made plateau that seemed endless…

One year has passed,

One year of friendship which progressed into courtship.

One year of sheer happiness, sadness, smiles and tears.

Their sacred bond was the culmination of the events and emotions over the past year.

But this uncertainty had to end.

The grey phase was way passed its matured stage.

Both Jack and Jill knew that. They knew.

Jill was obdurate. She awaited or foreshadowed an unraveling of signs or divine revelation that would give her an answer.

She just would not budge; she had it ‘in the bag’.

But as she prayed and dwelled deeper into her heart, she got lost in her ocean of emotions.

“It’s a maze down here!” she exclaimed.

Some days she felt she found her way out,

Some days she sulked and gave up.

Slowly but surely, she grew to understand herself better.

Jill was afraid.

She was afraid of relationships. Of commitment.

She was comfortable.

She grew to be selfish.

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The light seemed far away.

I couldn’t swim to the surface.

I needed more time. (Forever and always)

What should I do daddy?

Show me your will?

It was time that I realized that he isn’t going to shout the answer right back at me.

He isn’t going to say, “YES!!!!” or “NO!!!!”

I was perturbed.

Time was running out.

As I continued to pick up my journal diligently and looked towards the cross, God’s faithfulness shone.

One question popped up evidently.

“ Which state will grant you the greatest avenue for growth?”

Followed by, little God moments started to speak to me.

….

“Intense love does not measure it just gives. ”

― Mother Teresa

From Facebook (AN APP HAHA):

“Today we believe God wants us to know that …

you can conquer your fears.

When fear is holding you back, don’t give up. Even the bravest people feel afraid. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the will to go on in spite of it.”

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The parable of David and the Goliath sprung up in my mind.

I felt like David who was ready to battle Goliath.

Goliath being my fears and past rather than the relationship. (Duh)

But the fuzzy feeling I had was beautiful.

It was the knowing that Jesus is holding my hand.

It’s the childlike faith that he isn’t going to let go, never.

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God as I start my car, please steer me in the your direction.

A leap of faith with you, that’s all I need.

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Jill leaped; she hasn’t fallen but as this quote goes

‘ A commitment does not enslaves, it liberates.’

Jill is liberated and feeling at peace.

–

Brenna

Brenna is usually thought to be a relatively loud and weird individual. However, Brenna enjoys the quiet and treasures her personal space and ‘me’ time greatly. Brenna’s fairytale story centers around a simple dream since her younger days. She dreams of great family with a loving husband/father, God-sent children and aspires to be a great wife and mother.

A Constant Pursuit

In the morning, he greets me with a cheery message. It brightens up my day (quite literally) and sets the tone for the rest of it. I return with a quick word of thanks and would tell him what I had on for the day ahead. I share with him my excitement, my dread and complain a little but somehow bearing a lot of hope because in the end, I know he would understand.

The morning gets a little rushed sometimes and I talk to him while I walk (faster than I jog) to work. It is a beautiful moment to feel the world rushing by but his love steadying my being. Other days, the mornings are silent and I just… work, those days I never remember.

At work, I hear from him but it is a rather surface level conversation we have. I think about him when I read some catholic stuff on the internet or on wednesdays I meet him at lunchtime mass. It is almost like a formality but there are little bits of emotion that leave me genuinely happy. There used to be these regular dates when I met him at 6.30pm just for some time together, I miss those days.

More often than not, we go out with another friend and it is funny how he does not talk much but his presence just makes me come alive, especially when he is standing in the center.  At 11, we end up in ado and have an intimate chat there. Like how yesterday I was really burdened but the mere act of honestly talking to him lifted all that and I went back as happy as can be. No big gifts that impress, just his love that makes the troubles of this world seem so small.

❤ Jes

Mk10:2-16 [27th Sunday in Ordinary Time]

7th October, 2012 Readings: 27th Sunday in Ordinary Time

I was actually looking for a lovely picture that showed the bond between 2 people and found a picture of 2 people holding hands and then it struck me that it looked like the hands of a person saying a prayer. 2 become 1 (: [jes]

 In this Sunday’s gospel, Jesus addresses the issue of divorce, describing how God created Adam and Eve with an unbreakable union and how all married couples should strive to achieve this ideal. Obviously, in my personal journey in life, I’m not yet in a position to comment adequately on or give useful advice about marriage, so this would definitely not be the focus of my sharing. However, since I’m currently in a relationship with someone, that should probably provide a basis for some input (:

Before I go any further though, let me first state my belief that everything in my life thus far is a gift from God. However, not everyone will share this same conviction, since this depends on: the family conditions in which you were brought up in, the circumstances dictating your life and the balance between the good and bad occurrences you’ve had to deal with. I’m lucky enough to have had a good life, a good family, and of course, a good girlfriend. And, since God has been so generous to me, it is only right that I repay his generosity by giving him the best I could offer: my life.

Intimidating and ridiculous as it may sound for some, the call of a true Christian is to consecrate your life to God, whether you are attached or single. From the offset of my current relationship, the basic rule that both of us have been following is: God before the other. As much as we can, we try to make every moment of our relationship a celebration of God’s goodness in our lives. It is only in this way that I believe God can reveal properly the plans he has for each of us.

However, the journey is not always smooth sailing. As I’m living in the UK, far away from all my loved ones, evil and temptation lurk in the corner, waiting to pounce the moment I let my guard down. Therefore, in my current experience, I’ve found that it is even more important to cling on to the foundations I’ve set, to remember that even as I’m far away from my girlfriend, I can still make a conscious choice to glorify God through this relationship. As long as I continue to immerse myself in prayer, and in the presence of God, I’m confident that I can, at least, struggle till the end!

To end, I would just like to extend a reminder to whoever is reading this: You are loved by God! Whether things are going well in your life or not, it is essential to remind yourself that no matter the circumstances, you are worthy of God’s love, today, and tomorrow, and tomorrow….In God’s eyes, we are all his children, and He will never reject us, just like how Jesus did not reject the young ones (:

Pray for me that I come back in one piece!

Oliver.